Sunday, June 22, 2014

Sass, Ass, and Class: And Why My Motto Should Be Yours, Too



I have been using this motto, especially after a long relationship that ended badly (and it’s catchy!) “Sass, Ass, and Class”, a great lifestyle change for me and hopefully for a few of you, as well. Let me break it down.

Sass – Internal
Sass means more than talking back, and talking back and being snippy isn’t always the best way to approach things. Being sassy with someone who is giving a job interview probably won’t turn out for the best.

However, by sass I really mean: Standing up for yourself.

Although this seems simple, it is major. I have been in situations that escalated into harassment several times and all because I was too nice. I thought that I was strong enough to take their pain as my own, because I thought it was easier that way. WRONG. I just became a target, and no one stood up for me. If you don’t stand up for yourself, if you don’t find a value in yourself, then who will?

Don’t let anyone use you. Don’t let anyone walk all over you.

There is a difference between being told to mop once and doing it, and being told to mop everyday when there are other people who have been doing nothing the whole time. You know when it’s been too much.

The most courageous act is still to think for yourself. Aloud.” ― Coco Chanel

Ass - Self
Judging someone at first sight, although we try not to, is a common thing. If someone doesn’t take care of themselves, you can’t expect them to take care of anything else. Would you want someone who bathes only once a week to take care of your child, or your car while you are away on vacation? I don’t know about you, but I would not trust them to take care of anything of mine.
Would you go into a job interview wearing dirty, wrinkly clothes and your hair a hot mess? Of course you wouldn’t, not if you want the job. But if you want to be respected and feel good about yourself everyday, you need to take care of yourself everyday. I’m not saying get a full face on, put on some heels; spend 45 minutes getting ready kinda deal. I mean wash your face, brush your teeth, and wear clean clothes kinda deal.

Health is a major, major part of life. You will feel better, live better, and I promise you will be treated better. Drink water for every meal rather than soda. Take the stairs rather than the elevator. Always wear clean clothes, wash your face every day, and brush your hair (if applicable). Carry your head up high, a good posture with your eyes level to your surroundings will also make you feel more controlled over your life and less kicked around.

Self esteem and self confidence are the best things in the world. The saying goes that you are your own worst enemy, and I wholeheartedly agree. People are always going to say you can’t do it, or that you are not strong enough to reach your dreams. But, have they met theirs? Look at the people who are successful in life, what do they constantly preach?
Don’t stop. Keep going. Never stop trying.

Compare that to those who are not successful.

You can’t do it. You aren’t strong enough. You aren’t good enough.

See the difference? What they tell you, they tell themselves. Pick who you want to be.

The first step is taking care of yourself, and giving yourself the strength and confidence to fight. Believe in yourself so strongly that the world believes you, too.

Class – External
In this over populated world, most people are horrifically rude and self centered. As much hope and love I see in humans and the world, I know this is true to a T. Working as a cashier at a mall in one of the richest neighborhoods in the world drove that home.

Be educated
Understand etiquette – I actually suggest investing in Emily Post’s book on etiquette.
(Warning: This thing is a textbook. However, it goes over almost everything, including how to behave on Facebook to weddings).

With etiquette, you see the world outside of you, and notice that others suffer. The reason why people are so rude is because they are going too fast and can’t see anything else. Stopping, breathing, and helping someone with a child take a seat or holding open the door will do wonders to your patience, your understanding, and your self worth.

Listening is also a major key. Most people listen to respond – people zone out 30 seconds into a conversation and just poke in “uh huh” and “yeahs” as appropriate. I know this has happened to you, it has to me and I hate it. To stop it, listen. No one ever got in trouble for listening. Listen to understand, and you will find yourself more whole as a person.

Be respectful, in order to get respect you must give it. Let your inner strength shine through your person, with your sass, with your ass, and rounded off with your class. Only you can make a change in your life, it’s your decision to make it a positive or a negative change.

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